Ferguson: Scottish people are handicapped

Posted by TFO on July 17th, 2010
Alex Ferguson

Don't help me, I have to learn

Manchester United boss Sir Alex Ferguson has revealed during a recent interview that Scottish people are handicapped.

He said: “Aye, it came as quite a shock to me at first. I remember I was just sitting on a park bench one day when I started dribbling uncontrollably.”

Ferguson then went on to say that although clearly disadvantaged, people should always be cautious before offering help to Scots.

“If ye want to offer your help to one of us, on the bus say, ye have to allow the jock to take your arm. NEVER grab them without warning, especially if they are still enjoying their morning can of Tennent’s Super.”

Despite being Scottish himself, Sir Alex has vowed to stay on at Manchester United until every seat in Old Trafford can be accessed by a wheelchair ramp.

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